This is a great piece of inspiration from The Daily OM: Nurturing Mind Spirit and Body
It's a great reading to meditate on... try it!
Rick, bleedin' daylight...
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Arphaxad the Great!
1 Chronicles 1: 1-27
OK, to use some stereotypical United Church talk, I realize that I’m coming into the Sabbath blog “from a place of privilege”. I’m not currently in an active youth ministry position, either paid or volunteer. I have no responsibilities for worship, youth group, or committees. My present congregational church involvement consists entirely of sitting in a pew, singing hymns quite poorly, and trying not to drop my bulletin on the floor during the prayers of the people. It’s awesome!
Maybe it’s the Spirit at work, or maybe it’s just dumb luck, but this time of group Sabbath has fallen during my own time of personal sabbatical. By stepping out of churchy stuff for a while, I’m hoping to discover what I get homesick for, and to see what God might want (or desperately not want in a million years…) for me. Just don’t call it “discernment”, because in our little UC world, that usually means more structure and meetings. Maybe that’ll come later, but for now, I prefer the Greek term “SLACKOS”. Loosely translated, it means “sacred-time-to-watch-TV-and-eat-nachos”.
There’s a strange paradox at work when the people who face the most difficulty in creating time for intentional Sabbath are the ones we’ve asked to provide our spiritual leadership. But, there it is. At the risk of sounding patronizing and rubbing it in, I empathise with people for whom Sabbath time feels like just another commitment in an already overloaded schedule. I don’t know how I would have done it before Slackos time.
Ministry routines for many of us are pretty basic. Make a list of everything to be done, write it in a calendar, and then try like heck to stay one day ahead. At the very least, give the appearance that you’re one day ahead. Sure, there are always surprises that will spring up along the way, but for the most part, it’s the regular week-in and week-out things that fill our days.
Finish a youth retreat, and immediately start working on the next evening worship service. Make a presentation for the board, and then book a coffee date with some kids. Go to a basketball game at the school, and then prepare for camp staff interviews. It’s about reaction - living in the moment and always anticipating what comes next. React, react, react.
It’s exhilarating and energizing. There are so many great kids to be in ministry with, so many faith experiences to share, so many amazing things to do. It’s all about the present, and the future is boundless.
The problem was that I’d created a constant state of reaction for myself, and I couldn’t keep up. I hit a point where I couldn’t see the future, I was out of ideas, and I didn’t know why. It was hard to admit, but I wasn’t happy with the quality of ministry I was offering, and I knew that the kids and the church deserved better.
And so, along comes Arphaxad, the great hero of 1st Chronicles 1. Based on the details of the scriptures, this is what we can learn about mighty Arphaxad in verse 17:
Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
He was begat-ten by some guy named Shem, and then later, he begat somebody else named Shelah. That’s it. But, somehow it’s enough to get his name in the Bible. Not bad, eh?
It may seem odd to read Chronicles as part of a Sabbath ritual. Perhaps the ancestral genealogy lines of ancient Hebrew societies are not the most spiritual content out there.
But, it’s the only place you’ll hear about Arphaxad. Besides, you also get to read about Nimrod and Gomer in the same passage. Funny names are always a good time.
Chronicles forces us to step off the reaction cycle for a while – to view ministry and community as more than just what comes next. It provides a past to support the future that we all dream of. People like Arphaxad laid the groundwork of faith that we’re still building on now, but unfortunately it’s rare that we take the time to realize that they even existed.
Long before we came up with that innovative new event (or activity, or song, or study, or story, or prayer, or worship, or…) our support network was already in place. For thousands of years, God worked in Arphaxad and Shem and Gomer and countless others, just the same way that God is works through us now.
Generations from now, God will still be working, and we’ll be the forgotten, essential, foundation-building ancestors. There's a lesson in there for youth ministry. Unless there’s a major Biblical revision in the meantime, we won’t have our names in the Bible, but that’s probably not why we’re in this, is it?
Sabbath for me has been an opportunity to remember where I came from, to re-discover that foundation of faith that holds us up even when we’re too vain or stubborn to acknowledge it. There are so many relationships for which to be grateful - so many mentors, friends, and family to appreciate. And alongside the gratitude that needs to be expressed, there is also much forgiveness to be sought.
For me, I couldn’t do that until I stopped reacting. I needed to stop. I needed to look behind for a little while before I could look ahead again.
There’s a lot yet to be done in God’s world. We’ve been given a heavy responsibility, and it can be intimidating. We’re not going to finish the trip all at once. But, as we continue on through Lent, following the same liturgical year that Christians have observed for a thousand years, it’s reassuring to remember that we’re going in the right direction.
There are a bunch of people with funny names who’ve already cleared a path.
OK, to use some stereotypical United Church talk, I realize that I’m coming into the Sabbath blog “from a place of privilege”. I’m not currently in an active youth ministry position, either paid or volunteer. I have no responsibilities for worship, youth group, or committees. My present congregational church involvement consists entirely of sitting in a pew, singing hymns quite poorly, and trying not to drop my bulletin on the floor during the prayers of the people. It’s awesome!
Maybe it’s the Spirit at work, or maybe it’s just dumb luck, but this time of group Sabbath has fallen during my own time of personal sabbatical. By stepping out of churchy stuff for a while, I’m hoping to discover what I get homesick for, and to see what God might want (or desperately not want in a million years…) for me. Just don’t call it “discernment”, because in our little UC world, that usually means more structure and meetings. Maybe that’ll come later, but for now, I prefer the Greek term “SLACKOS”. Loosely translated, it means “sacred-time-to-watch-TV-and-eat-nachos”.
There’s a strange paradox at work when the people who face the most difficulty in creating time for intentional Sabbath are the ones we’ve asked to provide our spiritual leadership. But, there it is. At the risk of sounding patronizing and rubbing it in, I empathise with people for whom Sabbath time feels like just another commitment in an already overloaded schedule. I don’t know how I would have done it before Slackos time.
Ministry routines for many of us are pretty basic. Make a list of everything to be done, write it in a calendar, and then try like heck to stay one day ahead. At the very least, give the appearance that you’re one day ahead. Sure, there are always surprises that will spring up along the way, but for the most part, it’s the regular week-in and week-out things that fill our days.
Finish a youth retreat, and immediately start working on the next evening worship service. Make a presentation for the board, and then book a coffee date with some kids. Go to a basketball game at the school, and then prepare for camp staff interviews. It’s about reaction - living in the moment and always anticipating what comes next. React, react, react.
It’s exhilarating and energizing. There are so many great kids to be in ministry with, so many faith experiences to share, so many amazing things to do. It’s all about the present, and the future is boundless.
The problem was that I’d created a constant state of reaction for myself, and I couldn’t keep up. I hit a point where I couldn’t see the future, I was out of ideas, and I didn’t know why. It was hard to admit, but I wasn’t happy with the quality of ministry I was offering, and I knew that the kids and the church deserved better.
And so, along comes Arphaxad, the great hero of 1st Chronicles 1. Based on the details of the scriptures, this is what we can learn about mighty Arphaxad in verse 17:
Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
He was begat-ten by some guy named Shem, and then later, he begat somebody else named Shelah. That’s it. But, somehow it’s enough to get his name in the Bible. Not bad, eh?
It may seem odd to read Chronicles as part of a Sabbath ritual. Perhaps the ancestral genealogy lines of ancient Hebrew societies are not the most spiritual content out there.
But, it’s the only place you’ll hear about Arphaxad. Besides, you also get to read about Nimrod and Gomer in the same passage. Funny names are always a good time.
Chronicles forces us to step off the reaction cycle for a while – to view ministry and community as more than just what comes next. It provides a past to support the future that we all dream of. People like Arphaxad laid the groundwork of faith that we’re still building on now, but unfortunately it’s rare that we take the time to realize that they even existed.
Long before we came up with that innovative new event (or activity, or song, or study, or story, or prayer, or worship, or…) our support network was already in place. For thousands of years, God worked in Arphaxad and Shem and Gomer and countless others, just the same way that God is works through us now.
Generations from now, God will still be working, and we’ll be the forgotten, essential, foundation-building ancestors. There's a lesson in there for youth ministry. Unless there’s a major Biblical revision in the meantime, we won’t have our names in the Bible, but that’s probably not why we’re in this, is it?
Sabbath for me has been an opportunity to remember where I came from, to re-discover that foundation of faith that holds us up even when we’re too vain or stubborn to acknowledge it. There are so many relationships for which to be grateful - so many mentors, friends, and family to appreciate. And alongside the gratitude that needs to be expressed, there is also much forgiveness to be sought.
For me, I couldn’t do that until I stopped reacting. I needed to stop. I needed to look behind for a little while before I could look ahead again.
There’s a lot yet to be done in God’s world. We’ve been given a heavy responsibility, and it can be intimidating. We’re not going to finish the trip all at once. But, as we continue on through Lent, following the same liturgical year that Christians have observed for a thousand years, it’s reassuring to remember that we’re going in the right direction.
There are a bunch of people with funny names who’ve already cleared a path.
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Scripture for February 10 - 16, 2008
The reflection for this week is Psalm 139: 1-18
O Lord you have searched me and known me.
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from far away.
You search out my path and my lying down,
and are acquainted with all my ways.
Even before a word is on my tongue,
O Lord, you know it completely.
You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is so high that I cannot attain it.
Where can I go from your spirit?
Or where can I flee from your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, you are there;
if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there.
If I take the wings of the morning
and settle at the farthest limits of the sea,
even there your hand shall hold me fast.
If I say, "Surely the darkness shall cover me,
and the light around me become night,"
even the darkness is not dark to you;
the night is a bright as the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
For it was you who formed my inward parts;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you, for I am fearfull and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
that I know very well.
My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes beheld my unformed substance.
In your book were written
all the days that were formed for me,
when none of them yet existed.
How weighty to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
I try to count them - they are more then the sand;
I come to the end "-I am still with you."
O Lord you have searched me and known me.
You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
you discern my thoughts from far away.
You search out my path and my lying down,
and are acquainted with all my ways.
Even before a word is on my tongue,
O Lord, you know it completely.
You hem me in, behind and before,
and lay your hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me;
it is so high that I cannot attain it.
Where can I go from your spirit?
Or where can I flee from your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, you are there;
if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there.
If I take the wings of the morning
and settle at the farthest limits of the sea,
even there your hand shall hold me fast.
If I say, "Surely the darkness shall cover me,
and the light around me become night,"
even the darkness is not dark to you;
the night is a bright as the day,
for darkness is as light to you.
For it was you who formed my inward parts;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you, for I am fearfull and wonderfully made.
Wonderful are your works;
that I know very well.
My frame was not hidden from you,
when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes beheld my unformed substance.
In your book were written
all the days that were formed for me,
when none of them yet existed.
How weighty to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!
I try to count them - they are more then the sand;
I come to the end "-I am still with you."
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Did I See God? (and Do I Sound Flaky for Saying That?)
Hi, friends in Christ. I am just going to type more or less word for word what I journalled today. It is long.
Before this morning's ritual I went to the shore of the Bedford Basin. There was almost no movement in the water. Just the slightest lapping (if you could even call it that). Small, thin pieces of ice dotting the surface of the clear though polluted salt water. No seals today. I am always watching for seals.
I was able to put my present stressful life in perspective. I am feeling overwhelmed with all the work of a new Africa youth project, 2 sermons I have to prepare, a sleepover, rotation idea kits and much more. The kind of ministry density I have created is too much. I start to function less efficiently. I start to feel physically unwell. And I forget that the world will still turn without me. The world doesn't need me though I can add to it.
(off to try to meditate now)
Fresh out of my meditation. Wow. I don't know if I've ever experienced anything like that. I feel like I saw and felt God.
I don't know if I had my eyes closed for 15 or 30 minutes. Time melted away though I could always hear the ticking of my clocks. I was very aware of my space on one level but a whole other awareness was filling me. The words "full of God" became my experience. The reading for this week says that Sabbath is time full of God. I could feel energy swelling in my body; almost like pressing out on my skin from the inside.
I kept reminding myself: "have no expectations". (Words from my mentor.) A few "successful" meditations in the past involved seeing bright yellow light shifting and dancing. But today I sensed the most comforting, peaceful darkness. If there was colour it was purple, almost black. I could see undulations of energy washing from left to right and at an angle down, like at the shore today. I was perfectly comfortable and actually felt energy pulling me backward (could have been the pillow behind my back) but it was a bouyant pulling. And I felt aliveness and soft electricity on the upper half of the back of my head. It was warm.
I slipped in and out of thought around all this. In a moment of thinking that I was losing the meditation I suddenly felt a presence rush in and fill me more deeply and fully than ever before. I thought, "This is God". "I can see God."
I felt absolutely that I was in the company of a force. It was like the black-purple undulating energy of before but it had a name. It was joyful without being happy (which is shallower). I felt immediately that it was trying to or was about to communicate with me. I thought maybe it was saying something but not with words and I didn't know how to listen.
I felt incredibly alive, not at all drowsy as I often feel when I try to meditate.
I feel no desire to pull a message or a meaning from this. I discern nothing except that I feel like I saw the energy or essence of God. And I am so grateful for this encounter. I long for this in all my ministry and churchy stuff and I rarely, rarely feel it there.
Before this morning's ritual I went to the shore of the Bedford Basin. There was almost no movement in the water. Just the slightest lapping (if you could even call it that). Small, thin pieces of ice dotting the surface of the clear though polluted salt water. No seals today. I am always watching for seals.
I was able to put my present stressful life in perspective. I am feeling overwhelmed with all the work of a new Africa youth project, 2 sermons I have to prepare, a sleepover, rotation idea kits and much more. The kind of ministry density I have created is too much. I start to function less efficiently. I start to feel physically unwell. And I forget that the world will still turn without me. The world doesn't need me though I can add to it.
(off to try to meditate now)
Fresh out of my meditation. Wow. I don't know if I've ever experienced anything like that. I feel like I saw and felt God.
I don't know if I had my eyes closed for 15 or 30 minutes. Time melted away though I could always hear the ticking of my clocks. I was very aware of my space on one level but a whole other awareness was filling me. The words "full of God" became my experience. The reading for this week says that Sabbath is time full of God. I could feel energy swelling in my body; almost like pressing out on my skin from the inside.
I kept reminding myself: "have no expectations". (Words from my mentor.) A few "successful" meditations in the past involved seeing bright yellow light shifting and dancing. But today I sensed the most comforting, peaceful darkness. If there was colour it was purple, almost black. I could see undulations of energy washing from left to right and at an angle down, like at the shore today. I was perfectly comfortable and actually felt energy pulling me backward (could have been the pillow behind my back) but it was a bouyant pulling. And I felt aliveness and soft electricity on the upper half of the back of my head. It was warm.
I slipped in and out of thought around all this. In a moment of thinking that I was losing the meditation I suddenly felt a presence rush in and fill me more deeply and fully than ever before. I thought, "This is God". "I can see God."
I felt absolutely that I was in the company of a force. It was like the black-purple undulating energy of before but it had a name. It was joyful without being happy (which is shallower). I felt immediately that it was trying to or was about to communicate with me. I thought maybe it was saying something but not with words and I didn't know how to listen.
I felt incredibly alive, not at all drowsy as I often feel when I try to meditate.
I feel no desire to pull a message or a meaning from this. I discern nothing except that I feel like I saw the energy or essence of God. And I am so grateful for this encounter. I long for this in all my ministry and churchy stuff and I rarely, rarely feel it there.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Sunday - day of rest...
It is Sunday morning- 6:51am Ontario time, and this is the last day of my week for choosing scripture and blogging as my commitment to this team. Early on Tuesday morning, I e-mailed my colleagues to suggest Colossians 3:1-17 as the scripture reading for this week's sabbath practice. It has been 14 weeks since I last posted on this blog, and I admit I still have not figured out how to add my picture so that you know my face.
Still, I remain dedicated to discovering what Sabbath practices look like, and am convinced that they have lead to "new life" in me. After reading Rick Gunn's blog previous to this one, I can reflect that so far my sabbath practices have been breathing, prayer and the head/heart work of journalling, and reading. But, as the time gets longer this month, I am looking to how I can build in my routine of regular exercise (running), to make it less of work and duty, and more of sabbath and play. I look forward to meeting with my mentor on this journey in person on Ash Wednesday, as we have been praying this practice in two provinces and am curious what it will be like to engage it together.
The ritualizing of the time has not been easy, from silly questions - do I keep the candle lit for the whole three hours - how do I make the whole time feel sabbath like - and not the first hour which feels most like home. My struggle to be able to let time be "free" and the need to know "what will be accomplished" are always at battle within me as the time gets longer.
I am planning to take this week ahead to reflect on the reading Rick chose, and to see how during Lent, there might be room to explore the practices with the two church communities that I walk with. I had thought, if I could just get my own stuff together, then I would engage it with others - but now I see that it is impossible to do alone. Knowing my colleagues and others are engaging, is a much different kind of accountability - than the "in the midst" of day to day interactions - me thinks. I can only test this theory out - and hope it strengthens me to press onward toward the goal of choosing Sabbath time over all the other pressing parts of ministry.
This I know for sure, in the times I have chosen Sabbath
- it has felt like I've chosen Life!
Blessings on the journey as the time gets more abundant this month. Maya xo
Still, I remain dedicated to discovering what Sabbath practices look like, and am convinced that they have lead to "new life" in me. After reading Rick Gunn's blog previous to this one, I can reflect that so far my sabbath practices have been breathing, prayer and the head/heart work of journalling, and reading. But, as the time gets longer this month, I am looking to how I can build in my routine of regular exercise (running), to make it less of work and duty, and more of sabbath and play. I look forward to meeting with my mentor on this journey in person on Ash Wednesday, as we have been praying this practice in two provinces and am curious what it will be like to engage it together.
The ritualizing of the time has not been easy, from silly questions - do I keep the candle lit for the whole three hours - how do I make the whole time feel sabbath like - and not the first hour which feels most like home. My struggle to be able to let time be "free" and the need to know "what will be accomplished" are always at battle within me as the time gets longer.
I am planning to take this week ahead to reflect on the reading Rick chose, and to see how during Lent, there might be room to explore the practices with the two church communities that I walk with. I had thought, if I could just get my own stuff together, then I would engage it with others - but now I see that it is impossible to do alone. Knowing my colleagues and others are engaging, is a much different kind of accountability - than the "in the midst" of day to day interactions - me thinks. I can only test this theory out - and hope it strengthens me to press onward toward the goal of choosing Sabbath time over all the other pressing parts of ministry.
This I know for sure, in the times I have chosen Sabbath
- it has felt like I've chosen Life!
Blessings on the journey as the time gets more abundant this month. Maya xo
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